When Sam Nordquist learned that Santa was coming to Face to Face Academy as part of the Holiday Family Event, he naturally volunteered to be an elf. As a member of the school’s Community Leadership class, Sam was always offering to help in one form or another. Choosing to be the elf, though, was Sam operating on a whole different level because he enjoyed nothing more than to make fun of his short stature. He put on a pair of pointy ears, stood by Santa’s side and handed out cookies while convincing the younger children he was from the North Pole. Sam was a jester, a prankster - always setting up the next laugh with his cheshire cat grin.
We open with this lighthearted story because in the days and weeks ahead, you will hear a great deal about Sam. Namely, about the tragic and unspeakable things that he endured in the last months of his life. He will be at the center of a national conversation about our increasing inability to see each other’s humanity. Don’t get us wrong, we welcome the conversation. It must happen. We worry, however, in the effort to make sure nothing like this occurs again, Sam, the person, will be swept away in the wave of someone else’s hate.
We are here to tell you that he was also loved.
Sam’s classmates at Face to Face described him as a friend without limits. Jade Nelson (Class of December 2018) shares the following about Sam:
“A memory I'll always cherish is back in high school with you. I was going through a lot and you noticed before anyone that I wasn't okay. You were still new at Face to Face, and we barely knew each other then. But that didn't stop you from checking in on me. You didn't even know me, yet you didn't hesitate to pull me aside and say you were there for me. I told you that you gave the best hugs. You told me that when you're down, you just try to think of things that make you happy.”
On some occasions, Sam’s acts of love were called upon in response to incidents of extreme hate. In his first year at Face to Face, Sam lost his classmate, Olivia McIntosh, to an act of gun violence that was widely publicized. The school community was devastated and, in an effort to address our grief, we helped set up a memorial in front of Olivia’s home. There was Sam reaching up to a second story balcony posting a sign of remembrance at an apartment that Olivia shared with her mother, sister, and niece.
Later, with the help of Music Teacher, Dave Boquist, the students composed a song entitled “Live for Olivia.” The inaugural performance of the song (at another Academy Family Event) is captured on video. There, in the background, you will find Sam keeping the drumbeat.
When Face to Face Health & Counseling, the partner organization of the Academy, was forming an advisory council to help remove obstacles placed in front of youth on their pathway to success, Sam was one of the first to apply. He was an ideal fit. The council played an intricate role in having Lieutenant Governor Peggy Flanagan visit Face to Face to raise awareness of youth homelessness.
Those who show this great empathy will tell you that it often comes with a cost. Sometimes the deep emotions a young person feels can be overwhelming as if they are carrying a weight that can seem unbearable. Such was the case with Sam when he first started at Face to Face Academy. Sam was open about his struggles and how it could interrupt his progress in accomplishing his goals. For four years, Sam had to kick and claw and scrap for every credit of his high school diploma. And in that process, we saw him grow, learn, and mature.
Now only months away from his diploma, Sam had one last barrier to overcome. One completely outside his or anyone else’s control – a global pandemic. For someone who worked as hard as Sam, it was disappointing to see him have to spend his last weeks of high school through Distance Learning.
In order to properly honor our graduates who now were forced to learn in their homes, we put together a virtual tribute. As a part of it, every senior was required to give a speech. In Sam’s address – recorded during a break at a group home for disabled individuals where he worked while finishing his course work – he recalled his academic challenges until he found Face to Face. He described the Academy as his “forever school.”
He especially thanked staff member Bryan Bakke who served as his advisor and who had Sam’s mom, Linda, on speed dial. Sam saved extra appreciation for staff member Rachel Samuelson who always found the time to deliver the needed words of encouragement when Sam was feeling down. In typical Sam fashion, he ended his speech with a joke: "Follow your own path. That is, of course, unless you're lost in woods and someone knows the way out. Then, by all means, follow them!"
The week of Graduation, Bryan and Rachel surprised Sam at his home and presented him with his diploma on the front lawn. Though they were supposed to practice social distancing, Rachel couldn't help but give Sam a well-earned hug. Somehow, Sam’s cheshire cat size grin was able to stretch even wider.
The diploma, however, was only part of a bigger dream.
This past August, Sam visited the school to tell us all about his plans. He was excited to start living his “most authentic life” and optimistic about his future. That was the last time we heard from Sam.
Six months later, there is much speculation about what drives the evil inside the hearts of others and why Sam was never allowed the opportunity to reach for this dream.
As we confront our own loss, our thoughts turn to Linda and how the two were an inseparable pair. We mourn the thought that Linda, Sam’s brother and sister, and everyone who called Sam a friend won’t have a chance to have one of those great hugs again.
When we tell Sam Nordquist's story, we will have to include both the love and the hate. We can choose to embrace his example of love. We must have the courage to fight all forms of hate. And because he would have done it for us, we shall always Stand Up for Sam.
How you Can Help:
The Nordquist family, with the blessing of Sam’s mother, Linda, and with the unanimous support of the Face to Face Academy School Board and the school community announces the establishment of two initiatives to honor Sam's legacy and positive impact:
Stand with Sam Scholarship Fund
Memorial Garden at the school's Outdoor & Experiential Space
To Learn More and Donate, follow this link: https://face-to-face-academy.square.site/
The Nordquist family has also setup a GoFundMe page for the funeral and ongoing expenses: https://gofund.me/a5679cf2)
